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So here I lay...

Born into a world where love conquers, we aspire to be the object of another’s affection - a bastion of hope and solace in someone else’s dreams. 

When the stress of life has worn me thin and I close my eyes at night to rest, I picture myself staring into your eyes where, in that moment, I become lost in your beauty and the complexity of a soul that speaks to my quest for love everlasting.

While mental pictures painted of you while I’m without sight are calming, the truth is I’m kept awake with a burdened conscience because I can't control fate. We build these pictures in our minds in hopes of bliss, but sometimes dreams are just meant to be dreams unrequited and not the realities we seek.

So here I lay, eyes closed and thinking about you, still. “I don’t know what to do,” is what I tell myself as I wrestle over thoughts and ideas I will probably talk myself out of soon. I don’t know if I’m good enough for you. I don’t know if you feel the same about me. I don't know if you have ever thought of me as more than a friend.

My fear of the unknown and the expression of my feelings scares me. Maybe I’m too afraid of what you’ll say. Maybe I’m too afraid of losing you as a friend. Maybe I’m too afraid to hear the truth - of which I fear I can assume, yet refuse to accept.

But when I head down a path of negative thought I pull myself back and remember the feeling I had when I first stared into your eyes - that feeling of comfort, of promise, of passion. While beauty is perceived by eyes unique, the image of beauty that permeates my vision is you.

So here I lay, eyes growing heavy and thoughts beginning to scramble as a new day beckons. A dream I’ve had for months on end is nigh, but when my eyes open in the morning and my dreams give way to my existence, all I want to be is your reality.

Sweet dreams.

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